Happy Mother's Day

Listening to the soft snoring of my beloved boys, I still can not believe that I am a Mom.  It began a little over three years ago with a scary beginning to a wide eyed adventure.

Meeting Kenny for the first time.

Motherhood for me didn't start the way that most women picture.  It was actually a scary experience.  Seven weeks early I went into preterm labor.  I had been admitted to the hospital and given drugs to stop the contractions and delay Kenny's birth.  My husband, best friend and mother were there by my side.  It didn't sink in how scary the whole experience really was until the day before I was supposed to go home my water broke.  At this point, I had been poked, drugged, stuck with more needles (long ones too) than I cared to count, and been to this point bedridden.  It was the first day I was allow to get up by myself and use the restroom without help.  Our condo was ready for me to come home and be on bed rest until Kenny came.  I never made it home to be on bed rest.

On December 9, 2008 my water broke.  At this point I had learned a lot about preterm labor and labor itself.  I knew that there was no going back.  Little did I realize that I also wasn't going to be taking my baby home and enjoying him the way that most couples do.  By 6pm Kenny met his parents for the first time.  Well, Dad anyways.  He was taken to a team of special doctors and nurses, checked his agar score and whisked away to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.  Ken was able to stay with Kenny as he made his journey, it would be a few hours later before I could hold my baby boy.  It was love at first site.  Today I look at him and I still can not believe how much I am love with my children.  Kenny was an excellent NICU graduate.  He only stayed there for four days.  He was strong, doing great, never had problems with his vitals.  He stayed down in the Special Care Nursery for about three weeks before he came home. Every day we drove, mostly in the snow and unplowed hills of Seattle's First Hill to be with Kenny, feed him, hold him, change his diapers and introduce him to his new family, friends and those people still continue to be a huge support for us.

Kenny and Daddy

First day home... the preemie salute

On January 3, 2009 I was given a belated birthday gift.  Kenny got to come home with us.  Ken and I were armed with charts, new information, diapers, formula and a great little baby.  Our lives had changed forever.  

My baby didn't stay a preemie.  He took off with great speed and grew into the wonderful three year old that he is.  I still can not believe how lucky we are.  His little brother Cole came along July 12, 2010.  I still can not believe he is almost two.  Time has just flown by!

Cole Allen Turner

I think being a mother has changed me for the better.  Never in my wildest dreams did I think that I mattered as much to one person as I do to just one son.  To them I am their rock, their go to person, playmate, friend, and most of all, their Mommy.  I am so blessed to have them.  They overwhelm me sometimes, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Someone stole my Martha Stewart wig!

I dare you to tell me that I am not Martha.  No really, some where if I dig deep enough, I am.  Okay.  So I hate to clean, my house is a little cluttered, and I don't love landscaping.  But really, I am perfect in all other ways!  Okay... maybe the diaper pail still has a smell I can't wash out, my husband still refuses to learn to take his plate to the sink, and well my darling boys are not prince charmings yet. I currently still have my subscription to Living so that makes me Martha right?


I think we tend to put a lot of pressure on ourselves.  I know that I feel like my house should look like it lives in a comfy English town, my windows should sparkle, my kitchen floor gleam and my green thumb imprinted on every shrub, flower or tree.  Let me run a magazine, have a TV show and raise my two flirty boys. I don't think we should lessen our expectations of ourselves, but I think we should allow ourselves a little slack now and then.  It is easy for me to get caught up with expectations that I can not fill, and maybe couldn't fill if I didn't have two kids.  After I had Kenny I was still able to pull off great tea parties to the T, since Cole came along?  I can still pull off a great tea party, but now it is focused on the group of friends who have graced me with their time without children.  It's a different focus, but my focus can not be all on food, decor and favors.... while chasing my three and one year old around the house... or in most cases out of the kitchen with their toys.


Maybe I am learning what is more important.  It is time spent and cherished with people.  We know that wealth, material things and what you surround yourself with doesn't really matter at the end.  Instead we should remember to focus on the experience of life, give as much as you can and surround yourself with great memories.  When we are dust to dust we can't take our stuff with us, so what can we leave behind?  I hope that what I leave behind is some really great memories.  When I am dead I want people to smile when they think of me, not be sad because I ended up lonely.


So what does all this have to do with parenting?  (Really it does)  we don't need to get caught up in all the "material things" we can give our children.  Most of my memories of my childhood and my Mother are things that we have done together.  Sure I can recite some of the gifts she has given me over time, but it is the time spent in the kitchen, crafting with her, camping, spending time outside and playing.  My mother gave me a lot of great gifts, imagination, creativity, independence, and love.  Today I am proud to call her one of my closest friends, but that didn't come by easy, she was always my mother first.  My kids deserve everything that I can give them.  I need to give them me.  That is what they deserve.  They need to know that they are loved and I adore them.  Some days though it is easy to get caught up with all the stuff I "should be doing" to help develop them.  You know what?  We did fine before technology hit us.  My kids will get there, they don't have to be reading at a fifth grade level by kindergarten.  Right now... I would love them to be potty trained by kindergarten! :)  Life is short.  Remember to enjoy it and enjoy our children.  Too quickly does this all pass. 


 Remember when your heart melted that first time those tiny fingers wrapped around your finger?